A plea to all young/future mothers.

The other day I dragged Jake to Bath and Body works because we were all out of hand soap in the bathroom, and my hands have become too spoiled to buy the grocery store brands anymore. Imagine my surprise when most everything in the store was 50-75% off! So I grabbed some body wash too, since I was about out of that. Spent about $5 in total. Cheaper than the grocery store stuff! For all you ladies, go check out your local Bath and Body Works; the sale goes through til sometime in July.

But that's not what this post is about...

While in said store, we were waiting in line to purchase said products, and in front of us was this woman who, from behind, looked to be about 25. She turned around and I realized she had to be at least 10-15 years older. TONS of colorful makeup, especially around the eyes. I have no problem with women wanting to look younger as the grow older. But she was sporting some clothes that should not be worn by anyone over the age of 18. I decided not to judge (as you can see), but then I looked next to her and saw her daughter who couldn't be older than 9 or 10 years old. I'd say 8. She was a cute little blonde haired girl, but something was wrong. Oh yes. She was wearing pitch black mascara. At such a young age! Not only that but she was wearing clothing very similar to her mother's, trying to act around the age of 25 as well. She also had a designer purse that was about the size of half her body.

This is where the mother erred. She was allowing her very young daughter to believe that she could dress and act like a teenager already. Mothers: Please don't do this to your beautiful little girls! They are only children for such a short period of time. Do you really want to blur those lines in her life? Imagine looking at her on her wedding day, and you can't remember her being young and carefree, playing in the park and coming in with grass stains. There is a time and a place for children to grow up. But at the age of 8 or 9? No. Makeup and expensive purses are not a necessity for a girl at such an age.

Society has made such behavior okay. Have you heard of or seen the TV show "Toddlers and Tiaras"?

Little girls wear bikinis, wear fake hair, fake teeth and learn to dance provocatively in order to beat other girls who do the same thing. I don't need to explain how absolutely perverted and disgusting this is. This is an extreme case, but this is what some mothers do to their daughters! And television broadcasts this, not only making them spoiled but spoiled television stars. What lies ahead for these girls? I don't want to know. Though I'm sure MTV will find them for shows such as "My Super Sweet 16" or maybe even "16 And Pregnant".

Life has a natural progression. We are born, and must depend on our parents for survival. We go through our toddler years and early childhood, where we must still learn from our parents and see them as role models (not your friend who will teach you how to apply makeup). Our preteen and teen years are meant to discover who it is we really are. Late teen and early adulthood is still a little bit of that, but it is only then that we must truly discover our own independence. We should never rob our children of discovering life in each era fully. Some of my most treasured memories stem from the first 10 years of my life, when I was free to be a kid.

Funny Thoughts.

So Jake has this Facebook "friend" that he went to high school with. I say "friend" because he never liked him much, but he keeps him as a friend because he says the most outrageous things on Facebook. So I decided to share these weird things with you. Just so it doesn't all go to waste, you know. I'm pretty sure they aren't all original, but it's okay.


I have a complicated relationship with zombies. They're dangerous but I love their swagger.


Fred from Scooby-Doo doesn't get enough credit for being the pioneer in alternative lifestyle cartoon characters. Oh, I see your man purse Tinky Winky and raise you a flaming orange neckerchief.


Do you think bears ever give each other really soft "people hugs?"


Karma is when you throw a banana peel in Mario Kart and you end up slipping on it.


Deers would be terrible at Frogger.


I want to see an Ancestry.com commercial where a couple finds out they're actually cousins.


The first sign of old age isn't gray hair or wrinkles, it's leaving your turn signal on for 5 miles while driving down the highway.


What exactly would happen if I messed with Texas?


‎"What a nice picture of you" is a great way to say "you're generally ugly, but it's hard to tell that from this photo".


Stick figures are skinny because they’re usually drawn doing jumping-jacks.


I'm terrified to sneeze while driving. For one brief second my eyes involuntarily close and I can't see the road...never mind the fact that I spend more than one second looking down at the radio to change the station.


France complains everyone makes fun of their language by imitating Maurice Chevalier or a cartoon villain. Try properly pronouncing "croissant." It's just begging for an evil mustache twirl.


‎"You only live once" is also an equally compelling reason not to do something.


I miss those old keyboards from middle school, they always made me sound like a typing prodigy...


I wonder how many professional ball players, after a long game, look forward to getting home and having a Capri Sun and a Fruit by the Foot.



I would assume that professional soccer players get the freaking best orange slices at halftime. Unless, of course, one of their mothers forgets that it's her game to bring them.



Birthday cakes are a little strange. Put one of your favorite TV characters on there, then watch mommy and daddy cut it up, and then you eat it. Really forces the kid to viciously kill off their childhood, but hey free cake.



I don't remember the name of any character Morgan Freeman ever played - he's just Morgan Freeman in every movie.



Its crazy to think you could smoke inside college lecture halls back in the day. Would it not be awesome to chomp on a pipe in class while wearing a blazer and say things like "Quite", "Mmmnnnyess" and "A rascal Yalie wouldn't understand!"


I wonder if Batman ever loses his balance while putting on his suit in such a hurry. Does he do the one leg hop thing we do when we miss our pant leg?


Whenever I walk into a large, mostly empty space (like a courtyard or a field or something) I immediately regret not bringing my sword or battle axe... because there's a 95% chance that a boss battle is about to occur.


They say there are loads of technological hurdles to overcome before laser weapons become practical, but let's be honest here, the only reason we don't have laser guns is that "pew pew" is not a very intimidating sound.


How is it that hipsters always live in the coolest part of town but don't have paying jobs?


When I attach my flash drive to a computer I still like to pretend I'm a spy downloading secret information and might get caught at any second.


Gruntled sounds ten times worse than disgruntled.


I never feel more idiotic than when I apologise for bumping into a mannequin.


Whenever I'm scrolling down a PDF file, that little grabby hand icon makes me think I'm copping a feel on the document.


As a man, I feel it's my personal mission in life to never have to make two trips while carrying in groceries.


Every time I close my garage door with the button inside of the garage, I like pretending I'm Indiana Jones trying to escape a temple just before the door closes.


Candy canes are by far the best holiday treat. Not only are they suckably delicious, but they can also be used as makeshift spears to ward off unwanted family holiday attacts.


If people winked in real life as much as they wink in text, this world would be a very creepy place.


I'm going to bring littering back, because people on probation need harder things to do for community service.


Hide and Seek was totally created by two friends who wanted to ditch their hated third friend with minimal confrontation.


Cranberry sauce is seriously misnamed. Sauce doesn't retain the shape of the can it comes in. Let's call it what it is. That stuff's cranberry jello.


There's nothing I hate more then when a bakery unevenly slices my bagel to where I have one mutant thick half & one piece of paper thin half.


Macaroni would be crap if it weren't for cheese. Cheese, on the other hand, doesn't need macaroni to stay pimp. I think we all know who wears the pants in the macaroni and cheese relationship.


‎"Sorry, we're unable to load a message from our sponsor." That's probably the most unnecessary apology I've ever received, but apology accepted, Hulu.


I think my lack of confidence in my decision-making skills stems from those ‘Choose your own adventure’ books I used to read. I can’t decide between one thing or another without worrying that somehow my choice will lead me off a cliff.


I imagine it was a pedophile who started calling his girlfriend "baby". How it caught on is an entirely different and more disturbing mystery.


I open the microwave door with one second left because it makes me feel like a bomb disposal expert.


All the landmarks and millions of beautiful places on Google Earth, and the first place everyone looks at is their own house.


Why do they include the nutritional information for both the unpopped and popped versions of microwave popcorn? Is someone out there snacking on kernels?


Checking Facebook is similar to when I say "um" -- it's filler between things that are actually important.


The guy who invented the "@" symbol needs to admit that he was just trying to write a lower-case "a" and things got a little out of hand.


Am I alone in thinking the Cookie Monster would make an awesome heavy metal singer?











That should be enough. I hope you smiled. :)

5 Albums.

My brother Kelly just wrote an outstanding list of his 5 favorite albums of all time. I couldn't pass this up. The truth is that I am always trying to put a list together in my head, but I'm always afraid of leaving something out. But I think this is pretty definitive. The only thing that made it difficult is that I grew up in the age of mix CDs and eventually, one song downloads. I don't always attach myself to entire albums, but songs. These 5 are exceptions. I feel like I just took a tour of the last 10 years of my life by making this list. Somehow I feel very emotional. I hope you take the time to read this, and to make a list of your own.


No Doubt, 'Return of Saturn'
I was turned on to No Doubt by my brother Oliver. He was a fan of them in high school and I wanted to like all the same things he did. So when I heard them for the first time, I fell in love instantly because Oliver liked them and the lead singer was a girl. Perfect. I held on to "Tragic Kingdom" for a year or two, trying to understand the complexities of the lyrics. When 'Return of Saturn' came out, Oliver had moved on to other music, so this album was completely mine. My parents bought it for me for my 13 birthday. I played it over and over on my stereo. The thing about this album is that each indivudal song is nothing particularly special. But as a whole, the album is a work of art. The lyrics and music itself are incredibly candid. At the young age of 13, this was the first bit of music that helped me to see into the life of someone in pain. I felt so very adult listening to Gwen's sad lyrics. No Doubt was my first concert, and they have always held a special place in my heart.

Keane, 'Under the Iron Sea'
This album came out the summer after I graduated high school. Some of my friends and I went to their concert in San Francisco the day it came out. The show that night was absolutely incredible. I had never experienced such a musical experience, nor have I experienced one like that since. It was probably a combination of being 18, being fresh out of high school and feeling like I wasn't quite ready to grow up, but the music I heard that night hit me like a ton of bricks. I've tried to explain the music that night, and the only word I can find to describe it is "spritual". THe sound and the words and the overall unity of everyone in the small club was surreal. That summer I listened to only that album. Every week I drove about an hour and a half out to my violin teacher's house. It was just me and Keane on full blast. THe summer was full of me being forced to grow up. I said goodbye to friends, had my heart broken and moved on in my life. Keane's magical melodies got me through.

The Swell Season, 'Once Soundtrack'
When it was finally time to leave California for college in Utah, my mom and I drove out together. We stopped halfway there and found a movie called "Once". The synopsis seemed interesting, so we put it on. The film is basically a 2 hour music video, leading you through the story of a man and a woman in Ireland who are trying to figure themselves out. There is a scene where they go into a piano shop and sit down to play a song together. As they start to play the song (Falling Slowly), I began to cry. It was one of the most beautiful songs I had ever heard. For a week after that, I was in complete awe of the music I heard. Does that ever happen to you? Have you ever experienced a piece of music before that just stays with you wherever you go? That's how all the music was from "Once". I then found out that the music from the film was from an actual band called "The Swell Season". I bought the album shortly after. My sophomore year it became something completely different to me. That year was full of a lot of pain and changes. I spent a lot of time by myself in my room. I put the album on repeat for many days straight. It became my own personal lullaby, linking me to something beautiful that reminded me of home. That year at the Oscars, Marketa and Glen won best original song for that film. In my opinion, the best Oscar moment I have witnessed. And I've never missed a year at the Oscars.

Dashboard Confessional, 'The Places You Have Come to Fear the Most'
Yes, I'm sure the decision to put these guys on the list is making you all cringe. I get it. The very definition of "emo" music. But this was my band for SO many years! Through all of high school I lived and breathed Dashboard Confessional. I sang until I was hoarse with Chris Carraba, I put on concert DVDs and sang along with the pathetic emo crowd. A dear old friend of mine introduced me to this band. At age 14, what is more appealing to a girl than hearing a gorgeous guy sing in poetic metaphors with an old beatup guitar? Somehow, this band has stood the test of time. I still love their stuff. Well, let me clarify: their first three albums, and maybe a little bit of love for "The Shade of Poison Trees". "The Places You Have Come to Fear the Most" was and is a great album. I listen to it now and feel like a a teenager again. There is no heartbreak or pain associated with it, just memories of deep conversations and good friends. The imagery associated with the lyrics to these songs is still so clear.

The Push Stars, 'Paint the Town'
Another thanks due to my brother, Oliver. Oliver got home from his mission when I was 15. He lived at home for the rest of the time I was in high school, which is one of the biggest blessings in my life. I was so lucky to have a great friend and mentor during that time. We spent a lot of time driving around Modesto, going to the mall or to the movies. Just getting out of Knights Ferry, which is pretty alienated from everything else. Oliver has a way of orchestrating a perfect line of songs, each song fitting perfectly after the last and before the next. When he got home, The Push Stars became a big part of his playlists. It was an overwhelming band to pick up on because they have quite a few albums. So I picked "Paint the Town" mainly and listened to it a lot. Each song is so powerful, each with a great climax and ending.